"I miss God"

I have been laid up for a few days with a 'flu like' virus and irritating as it has been to feel 'incapacitated'. But it has also been an opportunity to deal with a nagging sense that something is amiss in my spirit as though something is 'out of joint' with my relationship with God and the work he has called me to. If I was asked to define the nagging feeling I guess I would of said 'I miss God'. What really helped me to see what 'ailed' me was the following excerpt from one of my favourite writers on spirituality speaking about his own efforts to be that which he was called to be by the Church and to do that work God had asked him to do.

"Basically all I am doing is trying to get it straight, get straight what it means to be a pastor, and then develope a spirituality adequate to the work...I do not find the emaciated,exhausted spirituality of institutional careerism adequate. I do not find the veneered,cosmetic spirituality of personal charisma adequate. I require something Biblically spiritual - rooted and cultivated in creation and covenant, leisurely in Christ and soaked in the Spirit."

A spirituality that is "'leisurely in Christ..." and"soaked in the Spirit." that is what I aspire to and will try to 'get straight' in the days ahead.